Arms
by Zachary Finnius O'Leary
Summary: My first songfic, Matt and Mello's life. No Lemon but some angst/fluff/yaoi/character death. Song is Arms by Christina Perri. Reviews please! Rated M for safety. Sexual Ref and language.


**A/N So another plot bunny started humping my leg and I have to write this so the little shit will hop away. Anyway this is my first songfic so reviews are much appreciated. I love this song a lot and it is way too appropriate for MxM. **

**Contains some angst, fluff, sexual ref, character death, and what not.**

**Yaoi so if you no likey you no ready!**

**Song: Christina Perri- Arms /Indicates lyrics/**

**Please note that I do not own Matt (Mail Jeevas) or Mello (Mihael Keehl). I don't own death note and I don't own Christina Perri or her song. I mean no intent to gain financial improvement from this. Strictly a fan being raped by a plot bunny.**

Mello's POV

Kira's spokeswoman was in the truck with my motorcycle. I see the abandoned church that will serve as a hideout until things blow over. Slowly I pull into the crumbling structure and my eyes catch the small T.V screen on the dash.

"Authorities are reporting that the man shot by the body guards of Miss Takada is indeed dead. 27 of the 60 rounds fired hit the suspect. At this time it is believed that he was not acting alone and it is unknown the identity of the accomplice. The name of the suspect has not been released, pending identification."

Tears blot my eyes as I throw the parking brake on.

"His name was Mail Jeevas…" I say to no one. "I'm so sorry Mail…I-"

A pain begins to boil in my chest and I see images from my life…Kira had found me.

**/ I never thought that you would be the one to hold my heart/**

_I was ten years old again, sitting quietly at my desk in my room at Wammy House. The little lamp shone down brightly on my study materials. A knock at the door jars my attention._

"_Mello?" Roger's voice chimed in behind the creaking of the door._

_I didn't look up; I was busy studying for the next exam and needed to be Near._

"_Mello I want you to meet your new roommate." Roger interrupted my thoughts again._

_I looked toward the door with a death glare deep in my features. I did not want a roommate. Roger ushered the thin boy into the room. He held a single suitcase in his left hand and stared intently at the floor. _

"_His name is Matt, be nice and get along." Roger whispered as he closed the door. His heavy footfalls became quieter as he walked away._

"_Just stay away from me ok. I need to study and I don't need the likes of some redheaded goggle wearing freak getting in my way." I growl, turning back to my studies._

_Shuffled feet brought him to his bed and I heard the suitcase snap open. Soon the digital sounds of music and sound effects echoed through the room. They were hypnotizing and made me drowsy. Perhaps all the studying wore me out…I had been at it for 12 hours. Soon my eyes grew heavy and I rested my head in my arms and nodded off._

"_Mello…hey wake up"_

**/But you came around and you knocked me off the ground from the start/**

_My eyes shoot open and Matt is rubbing my back and making soothing sounds. I felt terrified and I didn't know why._

"_Hey, you were having a bad dream." Matt whispered._

_I looked at him with confusion, "I was?"_

_He reached up with a gloved hand and wiped a tear from my cheek, "Yeah. You're okay now, I'm here if you need me."_

_Never before had someone been so kind to me. I was horrible to him the first 30 seconds he were here and yet, Matt was still so kind. The tears continued to flow slowly from my eyes; I couldn't make them stop._

**/You put your arms around me and I believe that it's easier for you to let me go/**

_He hugged me so tightly, so close, that I broke down. I sobbed uncontrollably into his shoulder. What had that damned dream been that made me like this? No it wasn't the dream…it…it was him. Matt's kindness was breaking me down. I wanted to push him away…but I couldn't…I felt…I felt…_

**/You put your arms around me and I'm home/**

Now the pain in my heart is starting to make me clutch at my chest. Another flash of a memory comes to my now shut eyes.

_We were 16 and we were in Roger's office…again. This time I had beaten Near to a bloody pulp. His bodily fluids still rested on my black leather vest and pants. Matt had nothing to do with it really, but he had watched it all go down and Roger wanted to talk to him. I had told Matt not to say anything; I didn't want him in trouble._

"_Matt did you participate in the fight?"_

"_No…Matty had no-"_

**/How many times will you let me change my mind and turn around/**

**/I can't decide if I'll let you save me life or if I'll drown/**

"_Yes, sir. I helped Mello attack Near when he wasn't looking." Matt said to Roger._

"_Matty." I whisper._

_Those piercing green eyes look at me behind orange goggles. He was taking some of my blame away. Matt didn't want me to be the only one in trouble._

"_Well you two are lucky that Near will be ok, but another outburst from you and I promise both of you will be out of here." Roger fumed._

"_Yes, sir. It won't happen again I promise." Matt said, looking at me again._

_We were dismissed and I grabbed Matt's hand, pulling him from the office. I slammed him up against the wall by our bedroom door._

"_The fuck Matty? You can't make promises for me! You don't control me. I will kill him if I have to." I scream at the redhead._

_Again those eyes…they look into my very soul. No words leave his mouth._

"_Damn it, say something!" I growl._

"_I took credit so all the blame didn't fall on you. I wanted you to stay here and work toward your goal of beating Near and replacing L. I want you to succeed. I won't let you fail." Matt said to me with a cool and even voice._

"_I don't need you to protect me Matt!" I dig my nails into his shoulders._

_Matt reached his hands up and grabbed my face. Our lips suddenly crashed together. My eyes go wide with shock. The kiss was brief, but a million words were exchanged between us._

**/I hope that you see right through my walls/**

**/I hope that you catch me 'cause I'm already falling/**

_We make our way into the bedroom and Matt kissed me over and over. _

"_Mello, please, let me keep you out of trouble." Matt said looking into my blue eyes._

"_Why? Why do you care so damn much?" I ask, breathlessly_

"_I love you. Mello, I love you." Matt's words grabbed a hold of my heart and made my knees weak._

_Matt slid his arms around my waist and pulled me into his body. He was so warm, so strong. My anger was gone, pouring from me, melting because of his heat. He really does love me. I kiss him again, needing that connection, that love._

**/I'll never let a love get so close/**

"_Oh Matty, I love you too." I moan into our kisses._

**/You put your arms around me and I'm home/**

The pain spreads now to my whole body, my heart is racing and failing all at the same time.

"Oh my sweet Mail…" The words sting my lungs to say.

"_L is dead." Roger said in a flat tone._

"_What? Who did he pick as his successor?" I demand_

"_He didn't pick one." Roger's voice cracked, "You two are the top students. Perhaps if you were to work together…"_

"_Fuck that and fuck you! I will never work with this albino freak!" I exploded and stormed out of the office. _

_I ran, ran to my Matty, he would make it all better. No, no, I needed to do this myself. If I drag him away too he would get hurt. I will just slip out unnoticed…_

_I open our door Matt is sitting on the bed bed playing with that damn DS._

"_Mello? What did Roger want?" He asked._

"_L is dead."_

"_What? Are you the new L?"_

"_No, he wants me AND Near to do it. I have to prove I am better, I am better! I will find Kira and avenge L. I am leaving tonight."_

"_What?"_

**/The world is coming down on me and I can't find a reason to be loved/**

**/I never wanna leave you but I can't make you bleed if I'm alone/**

"_I am leaving Matty, right now. I am going to catch Kira myself."_

"_Where will you go?"_

"_L.A."_

"_The U.S? Let me come with you, I can help."_

"_No Matty, stay here. I don't want anything to happen to you. I couldn't live with myself if you got hurt or worse in all this. All Kira needs is a name and face and possible just a face. It isn't safe."_

_Matty jumped from the bed and grabbed me, hugging me, "Please don't do this. I won't let you go."_

**/You put your arms around me and I believe that it's easier for you to let me go/**

**/I hope that you see right through my walls/**

"_No Matty, you have to let me go. This is what my destiny is, I must go." I pushed him back. _

_It is tearing my heart apart to say that. I want him with me; I want him by my side, but I can't. I have to push Matt away. Quickly I pack my things and look at him. He just stood there, staring, unsure of what to do. I gave him a hug and kissed him deeply._

"_Promise me Mihael, promise me if you decide you need me you will call for me." His eyes made me freeze._

**/I hope that you catch me, 'cause I'm already falling/**

**/I'll never let a love get so close/**

**/You put your arms around me and I'm home/**

_I want to tell him I am not leaving or that I am taking him with me. I want to stay with him. I don't want to say the words._

"_I won't need you Matt, nothing will make me endanger you." I kiss the redhead one last time and run out the door._

Things are starting to go black. My brain is shutting down, the pain is too much. I can feel the beats slow…stopping.

_I had hit a dead end and needed a hacker. The only one I knew was Matt. I didn't want him to be here, but I needed his skills. I summoned him from England. He arrived on an early morning flight. My Mafia driver took me to the airport and there he stood at the entrance to the terminal._

**/I tried my best to never let you in to see the truth/**

**/And I've never opened up/**

_I got out of the car and he spotted me. Slowly Matt approached me and smiled._

"_I thought you would never call me." He said in a flat, almost mocking tone._

"_I needed your hacking skills." I said dryly._

"_You needed more than that Mello." His words pierced my heart. "You needed me."_

_His arms wrapped around my neck and pulled me into the kiss I had been longing for. I embraced him and kissed him deeper. Sure it was a show of weakness, but my Matty is my weakness._

**/I've never truly loved 'Till you put your arms around me/**

**/And I believe that it's easier for you to let me go/**

_The explosion was massive, just 3 days after he arrived in L.A I went and decided to blow myself up. Half of my body was burned. Despite my orders not to leave the hideout he came and found me, pulled me from the burning rubble._

"_Mail! I told you not to leave the hideout. I said…I said…" My mind wasn't working, the pain was too much._

"_Quit being a badass Mihael. Let me take care of you okay?"_

**/I hope that you see right through my walls/**

**/I hope that you catch me, 'cause I'm already falling/**

_He stayed with me day in and day out for a week. He changed my bandages and cleaned the burns. Never once did he leave my side. Once I could get up he would assist me with putting my clothes on over the still tender burns. _

"_Feeling better?" He asked._

_I was sitting up on the bed looking over the burns I could see._

"_Yes." I said._

_He sat beside me and ran a cool cloth over the scars, "Does that hurt?"_

"_No."_

_He kissed me._

"_Thank you Mail."_

"_For what?"_

"_Saving me, loving me, being here. I have been horrible to you."_

"_Hmm, ya know…I do it because I love you, that hasn't changed."_

_Our eyes meet and he kissed me again. We fell back onto the bed and his hand traced my scar, my abs, and my chest. He worked me into a frenzy until I couldn't say no. For the first time in nearly 10 years of knowing each other, being in love, being so close… we made love._

**/I'll never let a love get so close/**

**/You put your arms around me and I'm home/**

_Finally the day had come, the day we would put my plans in place. We knew we would probably die, but hoped we wouldn't. We made love multiple times the night before, fucking like we would never see each other ever again. We wouldn't._

"_Mihael, come back safe to me." Mail's voice made me want to say fuck it all and give up._

"_You too Mail." I smiled._

_With a final kiss he got in his car and left. I put on my helmet and went to my post. Now, now I am here, dying. My breath has stopped and my brain is defaulting. The sounds of the news fade away and I don't hear the fire begin to crackle around me._

"Mihael."

I sit up and look at the figure talking to me.

"Mail?"

He extends his hand and pulls me from the burning truck. We walk out of the flaming rubble and see a car with three men in it. They are watching the disaster before them. The one in the back seat is the fake L, Kira. I was certain.

"They aren't looking at us Mail."

"They can't see us."

I look on as the church collapses onto the truck.

"Mail? Are we dead?" I ask.

"Yes."

I grab my rosary and roll it in my fingers.

"I am not going to Heaven am I?"

"No."

I look at him, "But you are. Right Mail?"

"No, I am staying here with you."

"Mail, go to Heaven, I will go where I belong."

"Mihael you belong with me, wherever that may be. Don't argue with me."

I open my mouth to speak, but you hug me close and won't let go.

"I love you Mihael Keehl, spend eternity with me now." His voice is silk.

"I love you too."

**/You put your arms around me and I'm home/**

**A/N Hey so what did you think? My first songfic, my first nonlemon, and I am proud of it. Please review. I should be rewarded for keeping myself under control and not writing a lemon. It is hard with these two. Ya know?**


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